1- FIRST, CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY, THEN THINK ABOUT HOW TO BE HAPPY
Bonnie Ware worked in pallitive care with patients who some of which only had a few months left to live. In this process, she managed to conclude that the biggest regret and the most commonly expressed among the patients was, “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.“
Life is too short to sit around and wait naively for that perfect moment. Thinking that happiness is just gonna fall from the sky, and walk into our lives in some form of money, opportunity, or that special someone. And that by simply embracing that moment we’ll gain the strength to: “start being happy!” NO. Happiness is a much longer, deeper journey, and it’s way more rewarding. Being happy is a daily decision, and just like any other habit, you’ve got to internalize it, which requires constant commitment. So, first have the INTENTION, be willing to step outside your comfort zone, leave old habits and negative thoughts behind, and finally start making those simple changes that are gonna enable you to become a happier person day-to-day.
That is, stop looking for happiness and start living happiness.
A study by June Gruber (Yale psychologist), suggests that constantly seeking happiness can actually generate anxiety. This happens when those who seek it, assume that if they do everything that they’re “supposed to do” to be happy, they WILL automatically be happy. The problem is, they don’t know how to deal with frustration if the results don’t appear in a timely manner. So, the truth is: happiness isn’t the result of doing just one thing, but of a change of lifestyle, and we don’t always get it magically by snapping our fingers or with a twitch of the nose.
You can start right now by making a few small changes such as: forgive those who hurt you, relax (you can’t control everything), put peace of mind first and not always reason (much healthier), redefine your values, smile a little more, be thankful, don’t pressure yourself, eat slower and enjoy every bite, etc. (etc = the rest of the 6 points of the article)
2- CHANGE THE PARADIGM: success doesn’t bring happiness.
This affects all of us because it’s the paradigm that society is still based on. Cultural and social pressure has led us to believe that a title, a job, a position in a company, a giant check at the end of the month, or a successful project, are the things that bring us happiness. But, what would each of us be if all that disappeared? Actually, the big checks, the job titles, and the projects aren’t what’s wrong, … what’s wrong is basing our lives, and our “happiness” around those things. These things are just too temporary and volatile to be the sole support for our lives . That’s why, the road to success is really completely the opposite of what we’ve been led to believe, and the truth is, you can get more, much more than you imagine, if you think this way:
“Success is not the key to happiness . Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.” ― Albert Schweitzer